Yes, this blog is celebrating its 10th birthday today.
I can’t believe it has been 10 years already.
What started as a simple collection of thoughts, memoirs, incidents, milestones has actually gone on and completed a decade!
Although the last few years, I’ve barely given this blog its due worth. But what I think is priceless today is going through the older posts and recollecting and reliving the memories that lead to it.
This blog was just a simple medium to socialize and network. A medium to put words to random thoughts. And did that successfully for many years. But I never carried on.
I complained about not having enough time many years back. And it has only gotten worse. I think you need to take time out for the things you care about. Somewhere, during the journey of the last 10 years, I lost my passion to blog.
But the fact that I am back here today, to spend time on this page, 10 years after I first set it up, means something. I will no longer continue to wish and pray and hope I can revive this blog. This hasn’t worked to date.
What has worked for me before is using this blog as a form of expression. No glamor. No mad rush to increase readership. No real interest to make new friends. Just my little space of expression and thought.
Life has gone a long way. A decade of celebration isn’t just full of fun and frolic. There have been pain, failure, loss and disappointments. But to sum it all up, this is life. I am father to 3 lovely kids, and a loving doting wife. We have all what we need today. Glory to Allah for that.
What really is the highlight of my day is to relive the excitment and unpredictability of raising a newborn. Yes, my little Fatimah, who will turn 3 months old in a few days. I’ve recorded my experiences as a first-time dad on this very blog a lot. Little less so when my little girl was born 5 years back. But this time, I want to capture as much as I can. Someday, I will come back, or maybe my kids will, or their kids – who knows how many generations will read this blog. Would it matter to them to know how much their daddy loved them? And what was it like to raise the kids?
I think it would matter to them. Especially, when they have kids of their own.
I am in a high pressure job but I will be kidding myself if I say I did not want it. I badly wanted this. But it is also time to move on. More so, to take time out for my loved ones. I have sacrificed the one thing that I know will never come back – TIME. So there has to be a balance. These kids are not getting any younger. I am surely getting older. And heavier. And rounder. But that’s me. For the kids, these are their best years! I want to make the most of these lovely memorable moments with my wife and kids. In my persuit to give the best life to my kids, I am taking away the best time of their childhoods. I am robbing them of their time with their father. A father who should come home without any leftovers from work. With a free and fresh mind, to give my kids a time of their lives. Every day.
Coincidentally, I was having this conversation with a colleague at work today. He said something that made me think. Our time is too short. And we ruin it because we are carrying baggage home from work. In our minds. So before leaving work, make sure you take it all out on someone. Any one. After all, your work owes you that 5 min to crib for all the shit you take for it, day in and day out.
Does our work or office really owe us anything? Does a salary suffice for all the crap you take at work? Your employers would like to believe that. Sadly it is true. It requires a very strong mind to disconnect from work. And reconnect again the next morning. I have failed miserably at that. And hence have spoilt perfect evenings worrying about work. This will not happen moving forward. My kids deserve better. My family deserves better.
And my body deserves better. Not just a obscene number on the weighing scale. All of this has to be aligned. My time, my work, my health. Not for me but for the few who love me. And my love for them. A healthy mind is as important as a healthy body. The last few weeks have been a revelation for me. Not because I suddenly attained nirvana. But because I’ve spent the last few weeks with a person who I despise the most from my work ecosystem. Yet, those man-hours spent working with him have given me so much insight. A man should never stop learning. More so from your enemies. I mean we are not sworn enemies but let’s just say we never got along too well as co-workers. And I was locked up in a room conducting an audit to fix a complicated problem at both our companies are facing today. We decided to bury our hatchet and get on with what was more important than me and him. Maybe I was not much of a learning for him. But he really opened my eyes. I refer to different phases of my career as ‘learning curves’ and whenever curve begins to flatten, I think it is time to move on. I think just when one of the curves was flattening, I ran into this guy. Professionally, this was one of those spikes that you long for. One that could change the course of a career. Who knows!
Maybe this is what a decade teaches you. To recognize, acknowledge, learn. grow.
To another decade.