Home » Blogging » Real life and blog life – Are you the same?

Real life and blog life – Are you the same?

The other day, I was having an interesting discussion with IHM and Sols on how different are we in real lives as compared to our virtual lives (or blog lives).

I think we live a dual life. Both could be similar or completely different. Why I say dual life is because our blog profile takes up a large portion of our time daily. It is very important to us. We give ourselves to it every day. We login without fail. We take out time from our daily chores and routines just for that. We make friends on blogs. We discuss stuff. We joke around. We have fun. And then, we logout and get back to our lives. To our families. To work. To the real world. Isn’t this like living dual lives?

In real life, we interact with people face-to-face, hear their voices, have physical contact, laugh out loud (in the real way and not just LOL!) while in the virtual life, we interact using only words and sentences. We send hugs and smileys and LOLs. We share our thoughts through comments that we can undo or edit if we want. Can we do that I real life as well? Would you walk up to someone you barely know and give him/her a hug? Or can we really speak out all that we write in comments?

So here’s a question to all of you. How similar are we to our virtual profiles? There are several bloggers out there who blog only through aliases. We associate that alias to that person. Are you and your alias the same? What do you all think? Lets hear it from the horse’s mouth. How similar are you to your blog profiles?

As for me, I think the real me, Masood Salem, and the blogger me, Logical Obscurity, are ‘almost’ the same. When I write a post, I write about what I think and what I stand for. IHM said it quite aptly “our blogs are a reflection of us”. I think that’s true. Where I differ is, in real life, I don’t speak up as much as I do on blogs and comments. For instance, on social issues, or on parenting, or on the global economy. I may hold opinions but do I have enough opportunities to express my opinion about these issues daily? I don’t think so. Plus, I don’t bother too much as well. Likewise when I meet different people. To many, I appear warm, funny and hospitable. But to many others, I may be silent, snobbish or egoistic. What I am trying to say is, in real life, our negative traits or characteristics, if any, are evident every now and then. But on blogs and comments, aren’t we making a concise attempt to reveal only our positive side, being all nice and sugar-coated?


99 thoughts on “Real life and blog life – Are you the same?

  1. This is a medium where we have a control over what we let the others know about us or our thoughts.. in real life however, its more than that. but again, with some friends in real life we are closer than the others and not everyone knows everything about us even there.. i wont call blog life as dual life, its a part of our life and like any other relation which is real, in the virtual relations also its we who decides how much involvement we want or can manage.

    But I find that i have not seen as many ppl in real as i find thru blogs who share the same thoughts as me over so many subjects.. n thsi pulls me towards blogging. Even I think I am same in blog as well as real. i do more of listening than talking in both te arenas πŸ™‚ n i like it that way.

    • Well, I agree. It won’t be a dual life if there is no difference between the real and virtual you. But I think we all show only our better side on blogs and comments. And this entire discussion has come up only because of the amount of time we spend on blogs.

      And ofcourse, there could’nt be a better medium to meet new people who share the same thoughts and ideas.

  2. I think I am the same Masood .. no difference even in the long post aspect πŸ˜›
    I talk a lot in real life too πŸ˜€

    Be it a small thing as the contents of a idli or on social issues, I always voice my opinion!
    I hv hd a fight with one of my very close friends bcoz I supported his wife! She ws rt and I thot he did not give her his due! It does nt matter to me if I hd lost his friendship bcoz of this but I wanted to let him know he ws wrong or better let him know we are nt blind to what he is dng!

    My blog is def. a reflection what I am! I just write when, how and what I feel like writing. When I feel like ranting, I do! When I am happy, I love to share the joy. I started blogging as I wanted to put down things which make me feel happy or something which affected me so that I can learn lessons from them and also get bk to read the same .. a post where I hv expressed my joy can def. bring bk a smile on my face when I am feeling low! It ws later that I started interacting with ppl et..al and I ofcourse feel that I hv to keep my readers in mind too, but I dont write anything which I just don’t feel about!

    And yeah, I hv met abt 10 bloggers by now and I have never felt they are any diff. @ all from the opinion I hd abt them from their blogs πŸ™‚

    To many, I appear warm, funny and hospitable. But to many others, I may be silent, snobbish or egoistic.
    This is abs possible even in the blog world rt! We read 100 blogs and may rx yet another 100 comments but hw close we r to each person differs! At the same time, some ppl may feel we r warm from our writings while others may feel we r trying to just show off we r so!

    • Well that’s really great.
      I think what you’ve done is quite unique. You’ve met up with so many bloggers so are in a much better position to judge if someone is the same or different. But my point is, would you show off your bad side on blogs?

  3. My blog image is quite different I guess from my real life image… but having said that… the people who know me really closely and the ones I am very comfy with will definitely be able to relate to this virtual hitchy…

    I am like hitchy only with my very near and dear ones… amazingly in the virtual world I am a lot more open than in real life…

    • I remember reading one of your older posts where you mentioned how you don’t have many friends in Indore which is unlike your blog through which you’ve made so many new friends.

      And what you mentioned is what I had in mind when I posted. In virtual life, I am more open too as compared to real life…

      I guess it varies from person to person. Hard to generalize.

      • In this new city.. all my friends are in the computer.. !!!!! πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ on the net… not in real life… I only know the chowkidar of our building and the shop keepers.. otherwise..

        • If you go through old comments from Hitchy or his old posts then you will find that he had a sense of humor even then but he was a bit reserved. It took some time for him to open up and same is the case with many of us.

          He is lucky that he found Indyeah, IHM, ahem me..Ha..ha..ha.. and some others πŸ˜‰ . If he finds 2-3 like minded people in Indore then through them his friendship will also extend. That is how all of us make friends in a new place. Don’t we?

  4. yea, our blogs are our voice out there in the virtual world…its really us in many ways! I know for some its a great way to relax and wrire about their thoughts and lighten their heart and mind. for some its about setting their minds free.
    Although I think we are more careful of what we say, how we say on blogs…there is always edit, delete possible. Also, i think we are much more politically correct and well behaved while blogging. And of course the rage fits are for the spouse :-D…bloggers spare you the horror of that πŸ™‚

    • “Also, i think we are much more politically correct and well behaved while blogging” – this is so true. This was the exact point I was trying to bring forward. We spend so much time trying to be well behaved and politically correct, which we are not always. Isn’t there a contradiction then between who we are and who are portray ourselves to be?

      And yes, poor spouses, who are always on the receiving end of that rage. We ought to unleash some of it on fellow bloggers as well πŸ˜‰

  5. Very interesting, Masood.

    Speaking for myself – I am the same in real life and in the blog world. Whatever I write about – I used to rant to my husband or close friends earlier πŸ™‚ Now they appear on the blog – that is probably the only difference πŸ™‚

    As for friends in the blog world – I guess in real life, people we meet are through many different mediums.. Some are friends we meet at university, school, work, spouses’ friends and colleagues. Very rarely do we meet people based on our ideas. In the blog world, most of us who read each other and enjoy a blog friendship have come together because of our ideas – so in some ways, we might end up relating better to them in a lot of ways.

    My blog is a reflection of who I am – it would be very difficult to be any different – for me.. Mainly because my posts are usually spontaneous – just the way I speak in my real life πŸ™‚

  6. Well masood,I blog about things that I experience personally or that happen around me that I get affected with.It can be about my daughter,my husband,myself,my cravings,my city or even the road system.Even at home I discuss about things that I feel strongly about with my husband.The only difference is the language that I use.While speaking I sound more colloquial,whereas when I write I make use of more literary words.

    That doesnt mean I’m any different a person.For eg.I may react to a speeding car by shouting,’was the driver nuts or what?’ but when I write about it I may express it as ,’his driving was pathetic’.It will still mean I disapprove of the driving and it will still find a mention in my blog.Its as simple as that!

    I’ve no doubt though that I’ve confused you with my take on the topic πŸ˜€

  7. Nice topic.. really a question….

    I am really Mahmud πŸ˜€ and on blog is the same.. in real life (rocking campus life), I go to my friends, seniors, juniors and nudge them with my feeling to them…
    I love people.. and I like to communicate ppl in real life,…. I think in virtual life, I do the same πŸ˜€
    I am quiet in some topics that i don’t like or can’t understand good………in blogs, I do the same thing πŸ˜€

    Masood, I posted a post few days before, may be you can go through mine…. somehow a bit related on thoughts…. πŸ˜€


    thanks for such a nice post, Masood Salem πŸ˜€

    • Yes Mahmud. Honestly, your blog actually is almost like your mirror. Reading your posts is almost like listening to you speak. That’s a really admirable quality. Hats off to you for that. Don’t get sucked into the glamor of blogging. Just be yourself πŸ™‚

  8. I think my blog profile is same as what I am in real.. I think that it’s quiet possible that bloggers can have to different identities, on blog and in real life. But at the same time I don’t think that they will have completely contradictory behaviour but little different from their real one.. What make me think like that is,
    sometimes people may write something to please a certain set of audience or maybe to gain attention while it’s quiet possible that they might not practice the same in their real lives… I might be wrong but that is what I feel. πŸ™‚

  9. I believe one can never change their personality. Yes! We all can improve and learn to be different at different amount of time and according to our surroundings and people but our basic nature wouldn’t change.

    People might start out as fake in the beginning to the mask wears off as one read them regularly. You can’t fool people for long if you write regularly. This applies to everyone with personal blog.

    There are ones who write about finance and other general topics and in their case we never really learn them because we just read their view on particular topics. But in case of personal blogs, if we follow them for long and interact with them then we will know their basic nature. They might pretend to be someone else on the blog and even claim to be all enlightened one day but still the fact remains that their basic nature is same and soon we see the same thing back.

    I would draw parallels with professional life here. You go to work and your colleagues know about your family and your day to day activities; not all but many close ones. Same way you go home and discuss your colleagues with your family members; again not all but may be with your spouse. It is not your regular topic of discussion but many occasions comes in where you mention them. The truth is you can’t separate so n so Masood from Husband Masood or Father Masood. Your responsibilities differ with situations but the decision you make comes from within and in every case you are just Masood.

    Same way when you start out on virtual world esp. personal blogs you might choose to reveal all and some might not. So even though we might not learn family details and other things about the person, we will still KNOW the person. By that I again mean the nature. The blogger can’t fake for long. A blogger sure has control over the content. Like I blog only some fun anecdotes on my daughter. I am a private person and I don’t like to reveal more than that about my family on the internet. So even when I choose to reveal something I make sure that it is within the limits of my comfort. I prefer that way.

    It doesn’t matter if you use your real name Masood or I use pseudonym Solilo, our thoughts still comes from within and the names doesn’t change it. I will give you an example. I have never ever asked anybody’s personal details, pictures or name and I don’t feel the need too. Let me give an example. For me IHM is what she is from her blog. I don’t care if she is Shakuntala or Rehana or Christine in real life because I know what her nature is and what the things she stand for are. With that thought I know even in real life if we ever meet, I can connect with her. Same with Indyeah. I never cared that her real name is Abhilasha. For me she was Indy and we chatted more about our thoughts on various subjects rather than personal details. I don’t care if we meet today or after 5 years or never. The closeness that made us best of friends is our thoughts.

    I have learned about a lot of people through blogs and I know with whom I can connect and with whom I will prefer to remain just hi-bye friends. Yes! On that account you are right when you say that we might go comment on their blog but in real life we might not be close. But I think it is okay. We have best friends, good friends and just acquaintances in real life too. We treat each of them differently and the comfort we share is also different.

    So the conclusion is we sure have control over what we write on blogs but we don’t have control over our basic nature and it always shows on our posts and comments, if not today then later.

    • Very interesting, Sols. Nicely explained.

      What you say is right. One cannot fake oneself on his/her blog, or any other blog for that matter, for too long. Eventually his/her true self is out.

      I’ve come across so many blogs that just copy-paste other blogger’s posts as their own. But thats a completely different issue.

      I guess you are right. But what really got me thinking is that I know so many bloggers who are always so happy and chirpy and always write positive comments, so much so that it looked almost plastic. Now I don’t mean to criticize anyone but just want to bring it out in the open.

      When I am not in a good mood, I refrain from blogging and commenting. That is my way of not revealing my bad or dark side to my blogger friends. So that way, whenever I comment, its always the good Masood. Just like Rakesh said below, blogs mostly reflect the good side.

    • If someone’s grammer is bad or writes an extremely boring post or a long one, would you tell him/her that it is a bad post? Or would you try and be politically correct and please everyone?

      Btw, this is what 99% of bloggers do including myself.

      • Masood, There are some people in real life too who walks around all chirpy even when they are hurt or crying from inside. So it is basic nature of some people.

        As for correcting some bloggers, I won’t do that for some random blogger..only for dearest friends and I have done that. I personally mail and correct them.

        Copy-pasting without credit is plagiarism. Boycott such blogs!

        Sometimes we are forced to comment on some blogs even when the content is bad just like in real life sometimes we put up with people who are damn boring. Ha..ha..ha..ha..

        • Well Sols, this is exactly what I was looking for. Our blog profiles should be 100% us but sensing from the answers of others, almost everyone positions the ‘good’ part of their personality on blogs while the ‘bad’ one is more or less hidden.

          LOL @ your last line. Its even harder to put up with such people in real life so, in that case, blogs are actually a boon πŸ™‚

          Btw, hats off to you for being so crystal clear while putting forward your thoughts. That’s one helluva thing. Well, I guess all those years of debating has to show up somewhere!! πŸ˜‰

    • I agree with Sol. I also feel we may remain polite on some blogs and we may clown on some other blogs, we may have our different moods and sides, but in the end, we can’t hide who we are – I mean not the real person. We may not share personal details – for instance even in real life I don’t discuss everything about my personal life with everybody.

      We also learn that disagreements need not make us impolite – that’s like real life. We see someone we disagree with, but we don’t pick a fight – we behave exactly the way we would have behaved in real life – like I know I would still try to convey that they should see the other point of view …often against better sense πŸ˜‰

  10. I may hold opinions but do I have enough opportunities to express my opinion about these issues daily? I don’t think so.

    Masood, I am someone who loves debates and esp. be a devil’s advocate. I have always been part of debate teams since school so my first foray into internet world was also debate forums. There were times when I argued with someone for 5-6 hours (the guy started stalking is another story) πŸ˜€ . We went back and forth on subjects. But that was then. I was working and lot more time on internet to check replies.

    Today on blogs, there are times when I don’t agree with the blogger but then I choose to ignore because I think it is her space and she is entitled to her/his opinion. Unless someone really invites for a debate, I hold my thoughts. Also, lack of time is another thing. When I choose to debate with someone I need to have time. That is why whenever I posted a subject like that on my blog, I made it a point to be online more.

    In real life too, I still debate with husband/friends/relatives with whom I am comfortable with and I know who can argue with nice pointers. With others I simply smile and ignore because it is just not worth the time.

    • And I was an extremely shy and introvert person when it came to voicing my opinion. Never took part of debates and always stayed away from discussions and stuff.

      So I guess that’s the fundemental difference when it comes to the real me or blogger me. On blogs, I may write a long comment on a topic I feel close to heart but in real life, I may just ignore the entire discussion.

      Now I don’t know if that is contradictory behavior or a matter of comfort and ease.

      • Masood, Virtual life does help people to open up. All of us voice things that we might not do in real life. I was a nerd too. I took part in debates but still spoke less and disliked useless chatterboxes. I have changed a lot since my school days but what I mean to say is that our basic nature never changes. That is why even now you take break from blog world when you are low.

        I still don’t like people who talk nonstop or write long posts without any meaning or just for the sake of it. Write long posts only when you have content like Indyeah or Nita. Then we read from start to end otherwise I find it waste of time.

  11. While we are still on the same topic, Happy second anniversary again…..

    Yeah as I said in my last post I can’t afford to be someone else (although it sounds tempting to try out a new profile) because most of my readers are my family, friends and cousins, very few blogger friends so they really know me well when they are reading me and I have to make sure I match up both my lives hahaha so I only preach what I practice hahaha, can’t afford the luxury of dual life I guess :), I love talking and I love sharing so for me I use it is a medium to talk out loud πŸ™‚

    But yeah in long run you kinda loose it if you are not being the same person…so enjoy being what we are and celebrate because lifes too short.

    • Thanks Sadiya.

      Well, if people who know you closely are your readers, then there is no chance. I agree. My blog also is read by my family, cousins and close friends so there can hardly be contradiction. But what I really wanted to understand was why are we bloggers not as strong a critic as we are in real life? We sometimes are very superficial, aren’t we?

  12. Oh yes, my blog is 100% me….

    As Solilo said, whether a real name or a pseudonym it is the person in us who thinks, observes n delivers….. Nevertheless, I do admire ppl who can separate themselves from their real selves, like the authors of fiction…..their maiden work might be autobiograohical but the subsequent ones are different!!

    The bottom line: it is so comfortable to be me-me, that I do not take the pains to get out of that zone…. so you get me and my take n some evasedroppings w/ or w/out refrence at my place… At that, there are phases of our personality that we show in degrees to diff. ppl (virtual or otherwise) depending on the strenght of the relationship: stranger, aquaintace, friend, best friend, n self…

    good day Masood and nice subject matter….ur comment space has become a mini blogger…n I wrote so much ooooops

    • hehe..no issues P n A. Welcome here and looking forward to many more looog comments πŸ™‚

      This topic was actually at the back of mind for quite a while. Rightly said, it is not worth taking the effort to move out of that me-me zone.

  13. I started blog for the sole purpose of writing abt my daughter and keeping a record of her milestone and other interesting stuff….so there is no point of me writing anything which is not happening in my real life….

    after few years i want to read my blog as a diary or me and my daughter πŸ™‚

    i do write abt other topics also whick come across…

    I agree with deeps we may write in diff language on blogs but idea to convery is always same…so I am 101% same on my blog and real world…

    Anyways i dont understand whats the use of reflecting a diff personality on blog…u hardly meet ppl in blogworld…so what u will get by creating good or intellectual impression among blog frens

    BTW it was indeed good topic to discuss πŸ™‚

  14. Well I think that the good part of me is almost the same with regards to my opinions about stuff and again like you, I find that I don’t meet many like minded people to discuss about such stuff.

    And the bad part of me is not at all visible on my blogs πŸ™‚

    • Bang on, Rakesh. That is exactly what most of us do.

      And don’t you think we all are really sugar-coated while responding to comments? Almost like we don’t want to hurt the blog owner’s sentiments.

      What do you think?

      • that is very true.. we always think twice before commenting on someone’s blog.. some how we end up being dual Character… πŸ˜‰ or rather being more diplomatic, not hurting anyone’s sentiments..

        • And that’s part of what society or culture call courtesy or diplomacy or so we are taught all our lives!! We are just trained to be goodie-goodie and bitch behind their backs in the dark !!!! quite a dualism indeed :p

            • Masood about being sugar coated and being polite on blogs we disagree with – I feel many of us are like that in real life also. Like we don’t tell people on their faces if we dislike something about something about them…

              Sometimes we learn this as we grow. I learnt that sometimes when I thought I was being tactful I was actually not 😦 I think that way we grow in the blogosphere also. I have seen people change very gradually, some have simply become politer, some have started looking at the other point of view, some others learn to ignore!

              • Yes, that’s true. We do all that in real life as well. I’ve noticed that some bloggers don’t even make an attempt to try and be someone they are not. It is quite evident in their comments and posts. I respect that. Be who you are.

                My brother felt that lately I was posting more for an audience than for myself. And that I was going against the very concept of blogging, where we write for ourselves. I had to convince him that just because I don’t write on topics that I used to write before, say 2 yrs back, doesn’t mean that I don’t blog for myself. I write whats on my mind. And most of us do that.

                But it got me thinking: how many of us write for an audience? Or for attracting visitors? Or for getting more comments?

                • This is a very interesting topic!

                  I cut almost all my posts to around half the original size, because I feel very long posts may not be read completely (Amit Varma of ‘India Uncut’ advises this too)… would you call that writing for others? Or writing to be read?

                • You know whatever we say, we always write keeping an audience in mind. But even then, we write what we want to say – not what the other wants to hear. So in that sense, it is ok.

                  Like if I feel about something strongly but I think that other’s wouldn’t really bother about this, I just would not write about it. But I would never write about something that I don’t feel strongly about just coz. it is in the news or it is the hot favourite topic among bloggers.

                  And I even find it very difficult to leave a comment on a post about a topic which I don’t really care about. I give such posts a miss instead of saying something like – Oh I agree completely…, beautifully said and a smiley at the end πŸ™‚ he he…

                • @ IHM – Well, IHM, in your case, most of your posts are delivering a social message. Stuff that you stand for. So, if you really cut short your post so that your readers stay tuned, guess there’s nothing wrong with it.

                  And secondly, come to think of it, if we were just writing for ourselves, why would we be on blogs then? Why not just maintain a personal diary that no one has access to? I think consciously or subconsciously, everyone wants to be read. And we all do write for an audience.

                • @ Rakesh – LOL Oh yes, that’s the sugar-coating I was talking about. Why don’t we just shed it aside? Sometimes I do that too. Like leave a comment saying ‘nice post’ or ‘beautifully written’ etc but lately, have stopped doing so. If a post warrants my comment, I do so. Otherwise, just move on.

  15. Quite an interesting post. Got me thinking and here it is.

    Well, I am myself when it comes to writing stuff in my blog pages – it is the real me.
    In real life, it might take a long time for ppl, to see the real me.
    I am reserved, will not give opinions and very choosy with friends.
    The frequency shld hit me in the first meeting, for me to choose a person as my frnd.

    Even, when I started commenting, I used to be really reserved. The madness in the comment section, brought out the ME, very instantly.

    But, I’ve made so many frnds in this blog space, without any reservation. This is a new me, which I discovered. I’ve given my email Ids, added so many as Orkut or FB frnds – which I never would have done, if not for this virtual world.

    So, in effect, ppl in virtual world see the REAL ME, even in the first meeting, while ppl in real world dont get to see the REAL ME, till a dozen meetings happen.

    • Thanks Uma πŸ™‚

      Do you think you are more yourself on blogs just because you have the comfort of anonymity here? Or that you are not interacting with other bloggers in real time or face to face?

      And yes, you are right. Blogging really brought out the best of us. It is a far more easier medium to interact with people and make good friends.

  16. That silly-lo is taking too much of your comment space ! Wish there was a way to stop her keyboard from functioning at times πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€

    Btw, first time here Masood, though I had been following your comments for a very long time.

    and I liked this topic of discussion – I believe I am the same, except for the fact that I become moody at times, but I dont put it out here (except for once πŸ˜‰ ). Infact, the moment I start reading other blogs, I get back to my normal self ! I had met quite a few bloggers, and I have found differences ! There are a few bloggers who are totally different from what they are in real life, cant name them here ! πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€

    See ya around buddy !

    • Aha..the great Vimmuuu..finally at my blog. Welcome, Welcome! πŸ™‚ (Now don’t get fantasies of Katrina Kaif when I say that) πŸ˜‰

      Well, now that is a very interesting twist to this discussion. Most bloggers here commented that they are almost the same in real life. In real life, we could be silent or introvert while on blogs, in the comfort of your laptop, we can sit and voice strong opinions about everything.

      That is exactly the reason why I posted on this.

  17. I feel I am just like in my real life.. only difference is I will write down more and I won’t voice out much.. and also I am finding it easy to tell the goo things about a person here than in person…

    I sometimes love the loneliness…. which I never said in my blog….

  18. Me? I am ‘almost’ the same… but, sometimes more cheerful on the blog.
    Real-life me is very moody!! πŸ˜€

    but, other than this one point, I am the same.. I do voice out all that I talk about!
    But, I am a bit more reserved in real-life than I am on blogs! πŸ™‚

    My blog has been my voice for a very long time now… this blog and this blog world made sure I have a medium to write and express my opinions and feelings more easily. It was a plus point that I made so many friends! And that there are people out there who take time out of their busy lives to come by and read and comment and more importantly connect.

    The bottom line is, I may be a bit more open and honest about my thoughts and feelings on my blog than in the real-world. But, its all me – both the blog-me and the real-me is the same when it comes to values and opinions and the places and trips and the incidents narrated are all true! And there are no dual-identities! πŸ™‚

    Awesome post Masood!

    • Thanks Pixie.

      Yes, in real life, we all are far more reserved. In my case, I have a short fuse in real life but in blogs or while commenting, if I am discussing something and am getting pissed off, I don’t get down to obscenities or leave nasty comments. I may just take off, wait for my mind to cool down, and come back and leave a rational comment. If the same thing happened in real life, I might end up having a fist fight by then!!! πŸ˜€

  19. I am almost the same πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚
    Although I am unable to express and discuss my frustrations as easily as i do so in my blog posts. I keep on cribbing inside until its unbearable….
    No dual personality i would say…for me !!

  20. We all operate at 4 different levels of frequency.

    Level 1. – The formal self – with acquaintances
    Level 2. – The informal self – with friends
    Level 3. – The deeper self – with spouse,siblings and in some cases parents.
    Level 4. – The inner self – with your dual self.

    It’s how we chose to juggle these levels determines our character and personality and therefore our blog.

    • Which indirectly means that we could be living dual lives when it comes to blogging, innit?

      Bang on about the levels, chief. That is so true. We keep switching between different levels as when the need arises.

  21. Sorry guys. Been quite busy lately so haven’t been able to reply to comments. The wife and kiddo were supposed to travel to India this weekend for their vacation. So was running around all weekend for the usual last minute shopping. Either ways, we had to reschedule because the kiddo was not keeping well. Its on for Thursday morning now.

  22. My blog is a part of the real me…but a very small one. It portrays only the happy part, and leaves the nasty bits out. Wish we could do the same with life πŸ˜€
    But yes, it is the real me, only a small part of the real me πŸ˜€

    • Aah..same here Meira. Exactly my case. The nasty us are left for the family to handle while the good us is for the blog samaj. Come to think of it, is that fair?

      • Well, I guess when it comes to writing, one cant masquerade. It somehow reflects to a great extent, cause writing is something wherein, unless you feel it you can not express the same.( Purely my belief..I may be wrong though). Choose what to let others know and what not ..thru your blogs …I guess is purely descretionary.

  23. I am extremely late here but must say this is a very interesting post! Who doesn’t like to talk about themselves πŸ™‚

    I think those who are blogging for a while can’t hide much of what they are πŸ™‚ A friend who did not know about my blog – took the challenge to find my blog in the blogosphere, and I have no idea how but found it saying, it was easy because what else could I possibly talk about,- apart from the kids, some favorite social issues, dogs and cats, and against some wonderful, even more favorite political parties πŸ˜‰

    Don’t you think this indicates, for some of us – (like sol said, personal bloggers) our blogs are a reflection of us…

    • Yes, very late. More so coz this post was written after our discussion on the same topic in my last post.

      Well, 100% agree that blogs are a reflection of us. I was thinking more on behavioral lines. I mean, some bloggers behave differently on blogs than in real life. For instance, I may sometime leave 10-15 comments on a post, fooling around and pulling legs but in real life, I don’t think I’d say 10% of that to that person. Maybe none at all. Coz I hardly share that comfort zone with anyone is real life. But on blogs, we do all that and more, with someone we’ve barely been acquainted a few weeks or months.

      Isn’t this dualism?

  24. I can say I aspire to be what I am in virtual life in my real life. Perhaps cloak of anonymity does give a license to approach and uninhibitedly express without fear of disclosure

    But yes blogging is all about self-identity

  25. interesting post there masood..
    let me speak for myself.. i dont think there is too much difference between the “real “me and the “blog” me.. but there are a few and i think i have built those consciously. in terms of the opinions i express i am as honest about them on the blog (on in comments) as i am in real life.. in terms of how much of my life i like to disclose to others, there is a difference… if u knew me in real life u wud know a lot more about me that u wud if u knew me only through the blog…
    But on blogs and comments, aren’t we making a concise attempt to reveal only our positive side, being all nice and sugar-coated
    may be some people are… but then its also because we arent interacting with “real” people thru blogs…if u knew ppl very well and interacted with them in real life, there wud be ample scope to reveal the good , bad and ugly.. but because we know other bloggers but have some distance between us, there isnt enuf scope for revealing other , not so nice aspects of our personality… plus on ppublic forum everyone wants to be politically correct and well accepted…

    • You are right, Mandira. That’s exactly the point I wanted to bring forward.

      I’ve received some very interesting responses on this post. Some claim they are the same, while some other say they are different. I think this is going to vary person to person. All in all, I guess it all comes down to what that person wants his/her blog to signify. By no means can we generalize.

      Btw, welcome here! πŸ™‚

  26. Totally agree with the last line there. Sometimes it so happens, that I cannot get myself to comment on some posts however good they are. Even if it is out of just plain boredom. But on blogs of people I know in real life, I leave random comments too. Meaningless blahs at times.
    But with blog friends, I always have nice things to say.
    You know what I think? We have a mutual admiration group on our blogsphere. Everyone appreciates the other and thus live happily ever after :):)

    • Bang on, G. I think its just like ‘you scratch my back and i scratch yours’.

      We all are a little plastic on blogs. But as long as we all live happily ever after..who cares!! πŸ˜€

  27. Hi Masood,

    interesting post and question. personally, i am using alias. i get comfort with it. blog is a media where i can tell unlimited (un)crappy things in my life, in an honest way. sometimes it looks so simple, but i think blog is revealing the deepest thought, knowledge or other personalities of myself somehow.

    have new friends or even communities thru blog is real. they are there. does smtg in form of non-physical thing shud be categorized as unreal ? the fact is it’s good to have real new people share their own views, knowledges or even crappy things. Laugh, ok even only being written down as LOL, but still we can feel that we’re laughing by the time we see it. personally, i think it’s real.

    well, this is a real smart and interesting question. i give comment on it and you can be quite sure that i am real too even i’ve never even met you before. πŸ˜€

    two thumbs up for ur blogs. keep writing.


    • Hi Blommer. Welcome here πŸ™‚
      Thanks for your comments. The thing is I have always wondered if people are the same on blogs as compared to real lives. And thus the reason for this post.
      Good to know that you and your blog life is the same. Its not the case in a lot of people.
      Keep visiting πŸ™‚

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