15 reasons why babies are better than adults

1. Just one no-nonsense way to convey their message – by bawling at top of their lungs

2. Hugs and kisses are such a natural way for these little wonders to express themselves.

3. ‘I love you’ would simply mean I love you though it really sounds like ‘gugu gaga brrr’

4. The word enemy does not exist in their dictionary except ofcourse the pediatrician

5. Ever heard of non-photogenic babies? Adults need to learn the art of effortless posing.

6. Demands must equal fulfillment – Simple

7. Babies always smell so good just as they are

8. Crawling to walking to running – it all just happens

9. You never get bored of babies

10. Talkative and noisy is normal

11. Look great in whatever they wear and even better without them

12. No such thing like “I’ve had a long day” or “We need to talk” from them. Nagging? What’s that?

13. Farts are style statements – any time, any place, any decibel

14. Smiles are for free

15. You can call them by all kinds of names

 

p.s. I read something similar in a magazine, improvised it and came up with my own 15.

Weddings and dimes

Weddings are complicated. Not only for the bride and groom, who take their vows and promise to spend the rest of eternity together, but also for everyone else. Strange things happen during weddings. Some of consequence while others, not worth a dime.

I attended a wedding yesterday. A reception actually. It was alright. Usual stuff. You know whats the worst part about such weddings and receptions? That, by the time everything gets wrapped it, its way past midnight. And y’know whats the problem with that? Finding a god-damn parking when you get back home! I mean, what am I supposed to be do with my car at 1 am in the morning? Shove it up my…err back pocket or drive it right into the lobby of my building, or better yet, might as well just sleep in it!

Common sense prevailed and I chose the obvious. Park the car along with 3 other cars that are blocking a dozen other cars and leave my phone number on the dashboard. We do that quite often. Infact people leave their cell phone numbers on the dashboard all the time regardless of the parking space or time. Anyways, so at 1.30 am, I hit the sack wondering which kind soul will act as my alarm the following morning and hoping as hell no jerk decides to take his car out at any other ungodly hour. The alarm did ring and it sure was my cell phone. But the one I set. For 6.10 am. I woke up and wondered why hasn’t anyone called me yet. I ponder for a minute. Should I just go down, move the car, come back and then get ready for work? Or should I quickly take a shower, dress up and then go down, once and for all, and leave for work? The chose the second option. Option 1 was obsolete. If no cars have moved yet, then how is 6.15 am any different from 1.15 am? With enough calculations by the minute to even make Kip Thorne blush, I stepped into the shower.

But even Thorne cannot account for Murphy’s law. At exactly that precise moment when the shampoo and shower gel are doing what they do best, quite uncharacteristically, the cell phone rings.

Sometimes I wish I was sloshed at such times with not a care of the world. But then how drunk is drunk enough? As said by Matt Damon in The Legend of Bagger Vance, “You see every drink of liquor you take kills a thousand brain cells. Now that doesn’t much matter ‘cos we got billions more. And first the sadness cells die so you smile real big. And then the quiet cells go so you just say everything real loud for no reason at all. That’s ok, that’s ok because the stupid cells go next, so everything you say is real smart. And finally, come the memory cells. These are tough sons of bitches to kill.” Guess being a teetotaler has its advantages.

By the way, this one’s not worth a dime.

A gift and a cook

Look what my wife gifted me before she left for India….

A Wilson tennis racket!!!! That too the one that Roger Federer uses. Well, not the exact same racket he uses but with the same measurements, built and specifications.

I’ve been wanting one for ages. And now I have it. Thanks a lot, dear. This is one of my best gifts ever

OK, so that brings me to another point. My wife and kiddo have gone to India for their vacation. I will be traveling later this month, hopefully. Its not been easy at home without them. In my wife, I miss my friend. In my kiddo, I miss my toy. But alas, I was never going to get a long leave from work. But that does not mean she gets to spend lesser time at her home coz of me. So, I sent her a month in advance.

And that brings me to the next round of snaps on this post. Without wifey around, I’ve been trying my hand at cooking. Though I have my mom, sis and sis-in-laws around, I like to try out stuff every now and then. And yesterday, was one such day. Dietary requirements meant I was supposed to have a few vegetables (cooked or uncooked) for lunch. I took matters in my own hands. Hunted down a recipe for ‘Mix Veg Stew’ and this was the outcome:

It turned out excellent. Sweetish and tangy. With lots of capsicum, cauliflower, potatoes and tomatoes. Exactly as per the reciepe. Though I was supposed to add mushrooms and brown sugar but didn’t have any. The picture does not do justice to the taste. In the end, I had a hearty meal. Ofcourse, I did need mom’s help in chopping onions and tomatoes. But the rest, my creation!

Cheers.

Real life and blog life – Are you the same?

The other day, I was having an interesting discussion with IHM and Sols on how different are we in real lives as compared to our virtual lives (or blog lives).

I think we live a dual life. Both could be similar or completely different. Why I say dual life is because our blog profile takes up a large portion of our time daily. It is very important to us. We give ourselves to it every day. We login without fail. We take out time from our daily chores and routines just for that. We make friends on blogs. We discuss stuff. We joke around. We have fun. And then, we logout and get back to our lives. To our families. To work. To the real world. Isn’t this like living dual lives?

In real life, we interact with people face-to-face, hear their voices, have physical contact, laugh out loud (in the real way and not just LOL!) while in the virtual life, we interact using only words and sentences. We send hugs and smileys and LOLs. We share our thoughts through comments that we can undo or edit if we want. Can we do that I real life as well? Would you walk up to someone you barely know and give him/her a hug? Or can we really speak out all that we write in comments?

So here’s a question to all of you. How similar are we to our virtual profiles? There are several bloggers out there who blog only through aliases. We associate that alias to that person. Are you and your alias the same? What do you all think? Lets hear it from the horse’s mouth. How similar are you to your blog profiles?

As for me, I think the real me, Masood Salem, and the blogger me, Logical Obscurity, are ‘almost’ the same. When I write a post, I write about what I think and what I stand for. IHM said it quite aptly “our blogs are a reflection of us”. I think that’s true. Where I differ is, in real life, I don’t speak up as much as I do on blogs and comments. For instance, on social issues, or on parenting, or on the global economy. I may hold opinions but do I have enough opportunities to express my opinion about these issues daily? I don’t think so. Plus, I don’t bother too much as well. Likewise when I meet different people. To many, I appear warm, funny and hospitable. But to many others, I may be silent, snobbish or egoistic. What I am trying to say is, in real life, our negative traits or characteristics, if any, are evident every now and then. But on blogs and comments, aren’t we making a concise attempt to reveal only our positive side, being all nice and sugar-coated?

Two years it is

Yesterday I completed two years of blogging. It’s unbelievable to think how far I have come compared to where and when I started. This blog was just a medium for self-expression (something that I never believed in before I started blogging). And now its an integral part of my life. Kinda like my virtual life.

Sometimes I feel I am actually living a dual life. One where I meet people with flesh and blood, and the other where I meet people only through words and comments. If something substantial happens in real life, it has to be updated on the virtual life.

Often wonder how similar are these dual lives. Am I too different in real life? Very few people know both of me closely. But I never really bothered to figure that out. Doesn’t really matter. As long as both co-exist peacefully.

I wrote a post last year on my first blog birthday. I summarized what blogging was to me then. So I don’t want to do a similar post this time. Rather let me think of what really changed from last year? Just one thing I guess. Ibrahim . He became a part of my life. Being a father, a parent, has been the single-most important, the biggest difference from last year. And I don’t think anything else can override this one ever.

Everyone ends up saying the same things on such posts – thank yous and sorrys and we go about raving about how blogging has changed our lives and how we made such great friends through blogs etc etc. I’ll not say all that. Its been said before. And I have nothing new to add.

So lets just keep doing what we do. And keep having fun. And keep blogging away to glory.

Lots of love.

Blog Action Day 2009 – My two cents

Blog Action Day is an annual event held every October 15 that unites the world’s bloggers in posting about the same issue on the same day with the aim of sparking discussion around an issue of global importance. This year’s topic is climate change.

Climate change is one of the most important threat to our environment today. And one the driving reasons behind climate change is global warming. In simple words, global warming is the increase in the average temperature of the earth’s atmosphere due to emission of greenhouse gases. And the simplicity ends there. The effects of global warming are far more profound. Please visit this link that shows the top 100 effects of global warming. And be prepared to be shocked!

So let’s get directly to the point. Call for action. We can make a difference. What can we do?

1. Use electricity smartly. Switch off those lights when you leave a room or electronic appliances when not in use like your mobile charger or laptop. Use certified green products.

2. Use water efficiently. Is that bubble bath really that necessary? Think twice before filling up your bath tub with all that water. Take care of all the water leaks. And close that tap while you brush, will ya?

3. Reuse and recycle. Newspapers and bottles can be reused or recycled. Find where you can do that in your city or locality.

4. Manage waste disposal properly. Don’t throw that chocolate wrapper just anywhere you fancy. Find a waste bin.

5. Reduce dependence on plastic. Next time you step into Carrefour or Big Bazaar, go green and use paper bags.

6. Use less energy for your commute. How about public transport every once in a while? Or better yet, just walk. That way, even you remain healthy along with the environment.

7. And incase you do drive, then buy smart, service your car and check your tire pressure regularly. A well maintained car and tires go a long way to maintain fuel economy and reduce greenhouse emissions.

8. No smoking. I know this is a tough one for all the smokers out there. But guess what? Smoking kills. Not just you but even who inhale your smoke. And that smoke messes up the environment. So?

9. Do you bit in making this planet green. Plant trees, flowers in your backyard. Or keep pots in the balcony. Don’t pluck flowers from gardens.

10. Spread the word. Buzz it. Tweet it. Scrap it. Shout it. Email it. Blog it.

Lets save the environment. For us. For our kids. For our future.

This one does not have a title

Sitting in a boring training on territory planning and account management. Thankfully we were allowed to carry our laptops to the training room so atleast I won’t die of boredom.Work has begun to look better. The economy is showing signs of coming out of recession. Thats good news for me because that means my customers will now have budgets for IT investments. And thats when yours truly will come in the picture. Fingers crossed.

I’ve finally got my hands on Dan Brown’s latest. So lets see if he takes us on a roller coaster ride like in “The Da Vinci Code” or be a dud like in “Deception Point” or “Digital Fortress”. For the record, I read both of them 3 yrs ago and was really disappointed.

Also, I have finally started my diet today. Not too long ago, I had almost hit my target weight but in the last two months, I totally neglected the diet & workouts and here I am, back to square 1. Need to lose 11 kg now. I’ve set a date of 1st Dec 09 to achieve this. Will be following the atkins diet plan as well as other fitness and workout plans. Hopefully my next update will be with more ‘fitter’ news.

And guess what? I think my kiddo is going to follow my footsteps into sports. I can proudly claim that he can now throw a ball. All of 8 months and that kid is able to grab and throw a ball a good 3 meters. Now, all I have to do is wait till he’s able to throw it 22 yards and, ladies and gentlemen, we’ll have a new cricket player amongst us. India’s next cricket superstar! Btw, full credit for this has to go to his grandpa. He’s the one who thought Ibrahim how to throw. And as the age old saying goes “practice makes perfect”, my kid, the genius that he is , already knows this. So what does he do to practice? He throws whatever he gets his hand on! Need I say more?!?

My wife may travel to India later this month. Still tentative. Last time she was gone, I missed her so bloody much that I wrote my first and only poem! Not sure how I am going to get around this time. But I have a couple of weeks to prepare myself. It’s funny how two people get together thanks to this wonderful institution called ‘marriage’ and then you can’t think of life without that person even though you’ve spent your life before marriage without that person. This one person, my better half, makes this life worthwhile. At times we may not agree to the same things or have the same interests or opinions but we’ve agreed to disagree. She’s stood by me on my toughest decisions and she’s taken some tough decisions for me. I rely and respect her judgement and advice. She’s made me look good in places where I could have looked real bad. At the end of a long day at work, one sight of her smiling face or a chirpy ‘hello’ on the phone makes the bluest of the blues go away. Fifty years down the line, when I look back at my life and be given an option to do it all over again, I’d not have it any other way than the way I have it right now.

28 and counting

…my blessings and white hair!

Yes, its my birthday today. Its that day of the year again. Last year, when I turned 27, I declared that it is the best age of my life. I was recently married, on the verge of becoming a dad, guns blazing at work etc etc. But come to think of it, not much has changed since last year so why can’t this be my best age? I am a dad now and its still not too long ago that I got married. Though work is a touch disappointing from last year. But I guess being a dad covers up for all that has not worked out over the last 1 year.

A few days back I told my wife that I need to make a list of things I want to do before I’m 30. Not sure if thats such a good idea knowing my habit of procrastination and, ofcourse, laziness. I may never come around to even make that list. My wife replied, why don’t you just go ahead and start doing all those things. Why depend on a list? I resisted the idea then but I think thats exactly what I am gonna do. No more lists for me. The wish list I made on my 15th birthday is still not complete so what are the odds that I will get to the bottom of this one?!?

There are a few things I want to do, places to visit and new stuff to learn (not to forget: new gadgets to own!) I think I’ll just take it up as and when I feel like it. What I really need to change is my health. Not been keeping too well lately. So need to get on to a more healthy lifestyle. Change my diet plan, start some workouts and physical activities.

As for today, no big plans actually. I’m off from work today and for the rest of this week not recover completely from my illness. Will spend the day with my wife and kiddo. Maybe step out for dinner. Grab a movie or something. I honestly think that once you become a parent, birthday celebrations are not for you anymore. Ofcourse a little something here and there is fine but cake, candles, gifts, decorations, parties, the works, are for our kids now.

So thank you in advance for all the wishes and good words. Its just morning and I’ve received so many bday wishes already. Thanks again and for those who haven’t wished yet, what are ya waiting for?

On Federer, blog break and responsible media

I usually don’t post the day after Federer looses. My last comeback post was after he captured the French Open crown. Last night, he lost his US Open title to an inspired Del Potro. Good game though. Fed had the momentum up until late into the 2nd set and looked on course to capture his 6th consecutive title but Del Potro had other plans. All in all, it was an entertaining final. Quite refreshing to see some young blood make the legends run after their money.

Anyways, so if it was not a Federer victory that inspired this comeback post then what was? Well, first things first, for the uninitiated, I was on a self-imposed blog break. Just needed some time off from stuff to get things back on track. Took a week off from work and spent the time at home with my family. Nothing like some good ‘ol family time. Also, needed to get my mind off work. Moreover, with the Ramadan fasts going on, it was quite challenging to keep work and all other responsibilities cued together.

A big big big thank you to everyone for all the kind and encouraging words via comments, emails, sms and calls. Though I did not reply to most comments, I did keep visiting the comment space to see what y’all been saying and read it over and over again. I am overwhelmed and thankful to be part of this wonderful blog-samaaj.

Well, what really got me to write this post is actually the brilliant ads been aired on TV these days. Not sure how many of you saw the latest ad by the ‘jaago re’ campaign team – ‘Khilana Bandh pilana Shuru’. Fantastic social message against one of the biggest problems faced by India today – Corruption. Such a simple way to convey a message so strong and so relevant. And what more, it is lead by youth. Common scenarios such as traffic violations, in govt offices, in trains with the TT, in religious places, by politicians, in education institutions etc.

I confess I have been a contributor to this all my life. I have opted for the easy way than the right way. But not anymore. I hope India opens its eyes to such fantastic social messages.

Heres the video of the Khilana Bandh Pilana Shuru ad:

Other super marketing campaigns are the ones aired by Hindustan Times. I’ve seen a few and loved each one of them. The basic idea behind them are on responsible news reporting. I can’t seem to find them on youtube. But will post the videos once they are uploaded.

Great to be back. And now I have a Google reader about to explode with unread posts.

Jaane na kahan woh duniya hai

“Jaane na kahan woh duniya hai

Jaane na woh bhi ya nahi

Jahan meri zindagi mujhse

Itni khafa nahi”

More than a week since I last posted. Its been a difficult and challenging last 8-10 days. Pressure every where. Work, life, health etc. I’m not one to rant on blogs but cant help it today.

Work has been killing me lately. Not the amount but the changes at work. Totally demotivating. Lets just say that despite getting promoted, I am going to make significantly less money in commissions as compared to the last 12 months. Several reasons to that. Our roles and powers have been made limited now. Our compensation plans have changed. And add the shrinking economy to that. All in all, its sucks!

Several other personal and domestic things are bothering me which I cannot mention here. Actually more than bothering, they are all disappointments.

Even my car, my prized Audi is giving me trouble these days. Some niggle in the gearbox and front left axle.

Only ray of light, only hope is my darling kiddo. He’s all that I actually look forward to these days. Always brings back the smile on my face.

And what is most disappointing is that, despite giving all that I have, all that I can, with every ounce of blood and sweat, I am still here. All I want is a simple and peaceful life. Stress, pressure, ups and downs are part and parcel and am aware and game for all that. But what I hate are the complications, politics, hypocrisy and the compromises.

I wish I could just get away from all this.